Friday Favorites

First, I just want to say thank you for reading and responding to my last post. I gotta say, for a country filled with so many different cultures, languages, and religions, and so many freedoms, we're not a very tolerant bunch, and that's sad. But I'm glad that I can share some of more serious concerns on here and open it p for discussion. We'll never be able to get over these issues without conversations. So thanks for taking the time to share your points of view and stories with me! Jenn touched on the issue of tolerance further, so be sure to check that out too.

Everyone excited for a three day weekend?! I know a lot of people are off or getting out early today too- lucky bitches! This weekend my first order of business is to remember the fallen (specifically my grandpa, who served in Vietnam). My mom and I are going to do... something. I'm not sure yet. Other than that, there will be grilling and burgers and parades- hurray! What are you up to? Short and sweet post today- linking up with Amanda!

Favorite Song: Terrible lyrics, but it's so damn catchy, I can't help but love it! Don't Mind- Kent Jones

Favorite Upcoming Events: 

• Manhattanhenge is this weekend folks! Those in the NYC area- get your cameras ready! 
• Also in NYC this week is Fleet Week! Check out the list of free family- friendly concerts, performances, ship tours, and more! 
• Closer to the Philly area? The Chinese Lantern Festival has started and goes through June 12th!
• On a budget? Derek @ Money Ahoy as a slew of other wallet-friendly ideas for your Memorial Day Weekend.
• Closer to Vegas? There's a cool Harry Potter/YA literature conference coming up in July- get your tickets now! 

Favorite Video(s): I'm pretty sure everyone has already seen Chewbacca Mom, but in case you missed it, here ya go.  And then she took James Corden to work and met JJ Abrams.

And then this... this is actually my friend's son, PJ, and this video won the AMerica's Funniest Home Video's grand prize... a trip to Shanghai Disney! His first words on National TV: "We did it!"

Favorite Moment: Finally celebrated Mother's Day with manis/pedis, shopping and wine this week!

Favorite Funnies:

Stabler never looked so good

PS. It's National Hug Your Cat Day!

Happy Memorial Day Weekend! 

Stay safe!

Tolerance and the Squeaky Wheel: A Rebuttal

You may have noticed that I've been a bit quiet around here lately. I haven't been posting or reading many blogs, because my mind has been consumed by a post I read several weeks ago. I've wanted to say something about it, but I felt that I'd sound like just another "squeaky wheel." But I can't stay silent any longer. I've written and deleted this post several times. I've edited it for tone, because the first few drafts were dripping with sarcasm and snark. But that's not true to the message I'm trying to convey or the point I'm trying to make; that's just my natural reaction to opinions that get me riled up, which I should mention is hard to do. I'm usually quite laid-back and tolerant of everyone's viewpoints, even if I don't exactly agree with them.  However this post hit a nerve. Please take a minute to read it.

All caught up? Ok, so here's my thing. I think everyone is entitled to their opinion, and I appreciate this woman's viewpoint. I think she shares a perspective that is very popular with a lot of Americans today, especially in light of the many legislative decisions that have been made on the state and national level recently.  Opinions are fine. But there are 3 parts of her post that bother me:

1. Inconsistencies. 
2. Facts.
3. Religion. 

The many inconsistencies within the post make me unsure of what she truly felt.  Was she writing for her audience, who might doubt her opinions? Or was she expressing her (conflicting) feelings towards the issue at hand? In one line she states that she has "nothing against that [couples kissing or holding hands in public]," but directly afterwards states that "it just makes me uncomfortable."  I mean I get it, I really do.  I understand people being embarrassed around PDAs; personally I've never been into it, and I'm a little "uncomfortable" watching two men kiss. But just because I don't love seeing it doesn't mean I think it's "wrong" in any way, shape, or form. We are all different, and love is love. Why should some people be "allowed" to express it openly, and others not?

The Golden Girls, keepin' it real since 1985. 

What concerns me is that a lot of the ideologies presented in this post may be shared by many of my fellow Americans without knowing the (very serious) implications of these concepts. One such perception stands out:

"i am glad that same-sex couples are recognized in a way that they can get information when one is in the hospital, that they can adopt children, that they can get equal opportunity jobs the same as straight or non transgender people can.  they deserve all that.  i am happy about all of that." 

I completely agree with the statement above, and I'm pretty sure that even people who may be somewhat homophobic or may not be rooting for gay rights would agree with that in terms of basic human rights. But what does that mean in reality? Whether a significant other can find out if their gay/bisexual/transgender partner is in an emergency room directly correlates to state laws. Laws that we have made and/or voted for on a state level, not a national level. I'm not sure that people not directly affected by such jurisdictions know and/or care about this fact. 

Her "facts" anger me because they are just plain untrue. If you don't have the time/energy/inclination to learn the facts, then please don't post them as such. Specifically, I'm talking hate violence toward the LGBT community and the definition of marriage, noted further below. She proclaims,

"why do i have to agree? i have a right to not believe the same things as you and not be scared.  just like you have the right to believe what you want to believe and not be scared of what people might think or do to you. " 

The last three words are the most poignant. Many people who "come out" lose their friends and family because of un-acceptance of who they are. one of my very close friends from high school was actually kicked out of his house at 16 when he came out to his parents. And I've never heard of a heterosexual person getting killed or seriously injured because the person they love is also straight. 

But it was this religious perspective that was the hardest for me to understand: 

"i believe marriage should be between a man and a woman only, and that same-sex couples should have civil partnerships... God created marriage for man and woman."

That second half of this sentence is 100% false. Marriage is "the legally or formally recognized union of a man and a woman (or, in some jurisdictions, two people of the same sex) as partners in a relationship." [source]

Now, I understand that some people are very religious, and that's fine! I'm not here to denounce or judge anyone's religious or spiritual beliefs. However, as the definition above states, marriage is a LEGAL binding. A marriage does not need to be officiated in a church by a priest. Many weddings take place in a courthouse, because it is a legal procedure.  As in man-made. God did not make up the legal system, we did. This is why we have that whole separation of church and state concept. I'm not touching on the term "civil partnerships" because 1. it doesn't exist (I think she meant either civil union or domestic partnerships, but I'm unsure of which, which it seems she was confused about as well) and 2. it would take me way too long to explain either one.

Lauren made one point that I am completely on board with and that I feel is worth repeating: "Tolerance goes both ways..." However, life isn't always comfortable, and love isn't always easy. The LGBT community has been "tolerant" of others whether they wanted to be or not. And just as everyone is entitled to their opinion, I don't have to agree with them nor do I have be be silent about my own just because they may be unpopular. 

I think it's important to have these types of discussions, and I want to foster a healthy debate for those who disagree. In keeping with open-lines of communication, I have informed the writer of the original post of my rebuttal. 

What are your thoughts on these issues? 
As I mentioned earlier, I am very open-minded, but 
please be respectful in your comments as well! 

Friday Favorites: Mid-May

This week was dragging ever-so-slow, but meeting up with an old friend for dinner helped get me through. This weekend I'm headed to another friend's birthday shenanigans and a party for Blue's niece who just graduated from college. Bring on all the good food, and cake! But first, gotta kick it off with some favorites from this week with Amanda!

Favorite Song: Oh Adele, you kill me with your lyrics once again. Send My Love (To Your New Lover)- Adele

"Send my love to your new lover

Treat her better

We've gotta let go of all of our ghosts

We both know we're not kids anymore"

Favorite Lust Item: This fun and summery Kate Spade watch!

{via}

Favorite Reads:

I've mentioned how I think making (and maintaining) friendships as an adult can be hard, but this is especially true if you move to a new area. Kasi recently shared an app called "Hey! Vina" which she describes as "Tinder for Friends." I'm intrigued to see how it works.

Micah shared her thoughts on taking detours in life, particularly career-wise, a topic I've been thinking about a lot lately. I was feeling pretty depressed about it, like How did I even get here? but I'm starting to realize that is IS okay. And if I want to make a change, well, I should just go do it. I'm working on that part.

You know those plastic rings on 6-packs (that you're supposed to cut so that birds/fish/etc won't get trapped in them when they land in whatever wasteland they make it to) that are incredibly harmful for our environment? Well Saltwater Brewery in Florida came up with a solution: 100% biodegradable, compostable, and EDIBLE (for humans and animals, but meant for the fishies) 6 pack rings. How cool is that?

Favorite Moment of the Week:
Dinner for my friend's birthday last night at Kraverie, a Korean BBQ+creperie. Not pictured: the amazing Nutella/banana/strawberry crepe we had for dessert. NOMS.

spiced pork burrito//fish tacos

Quote of The Week: 

Favorite Funnies:

(sorry for the impending nightmares!)

just sayin'

for the GoT fans...

101 in 1001: An Update

Back in December, I decided to start a new 101 in 1001 challenge, and actually try to accomplish more than the 33 items I had done on my previous one! One of my goals was to write about my progress once a month, which I'm obviously failing at being that this is the first time I've even mentioned the list since I created it! However, I found this awesome link-up to track this list quarterly over at Macy's blog, so I decided to join to keep myself accountable and share my progress! However, I could use your help! I currently only have 98 goals on my list- and I can't of what else I'd like to add! So if you have any ideas, please share them with me! For the (mostly) full list, click here!

Completed: 12/101

Road trip in the USA (at least 5 states) (Kentucky Bourbon Trail, 12/14/15)
Get my Passport renewed 5/7/16
Go see the tree in Rockefeller Center at Christmas Time 1/6/15
See another Cirque du Soleil show 5/3/16
Host a game night 4/29/16
Go to a speakeasy (The Ship NYC, 1/20/16) 

Watch a movie in 3D (Star Wars: The Force Awakens 12/18/15)

Go to a comedy show (Whitney Cummings, 1/21/16)
Go to another concert (Bruce Springsteen, 1/31/16!) 

Clean out email 12/30/15

Get rid of 101 items 4/22/16

Buy a new laptop or seriously fix the one I have (New HP laptop, 12/12/15)

In Progress: 17/101

Read all the books I currently own but haven’t yet read
If this is one of your goals as well, please join Erin and I for "Read My Books," a link-up that will go live on the second Thursday of July, July 14th! It's actually the first time I've co-hosted a link-up, so I'm pretty excited and hope you'll join! And there are 2 Amazon gift cards up for grabs just for participating! 

Read 101 books (8/101) 
You can see what I've read so far here! 

Finish a 1000 piece jigsaw puzzle
I started this back in December, but haven't touched it in a few months.... oops. 

Try a new recipe (at least) once a month for a year 3/12
Unfortunately I haven't actually posted any of these recipes yet, but I'm hoping to do so in the near future!

Figure out a skincare routine
Find my holy grail item in each makeup category
Find holy grail skincare and hair care products
Thanks to a few blogger recommendations and a recent trip to Ulta, I'm well on my way to figuring out what works best for my skin, face, and hair. Of course, this takes time, as using a product once won't give the best results, and that's what I'm working towards! 

Create and maintain a "staples" closet/wardrobe
I still need a few "key" pieces, such as a great, high-quality blazer and/or suit, but I've weeded out the stuff that no longer works for me, and that's half the battle, amiright?

Pay off student loans 
I'm happy to report that one loan has been PAID. Woot! However I did a huge consolidation for a bunch of other ones, and that's going to take quite some time to pay off. Baby steps. 

Try 101 different bars and restaurants 28/101
To see the list of places I've been to so far, click here! I'd also like to review these places on Yelp, but I haven't been quite that ambitious as of yet. Maybe I should add that as another goal?

Get my apartment and possessions 100% organized
I'm about halfway done with this one. I need to go through some closet, and all the crap I have stored in the basement that no longer serves any purpose other than taking up space. 

Organize all of my photos and back them up in multiple places

Organize all of my music files, delete/update as necessary
I've uploaded all of these onto my laptop, and then left them there. I need to go through, delete old files and broken links, edit song titles, etc. 

Set up a new vanity area with makeup and jewelry storage
I actually did get my make-up area cleaned up with the help of an organizer from Home Goods, but my jewelry is still in disarray with missing earrings, necklaces in need of a new clasp, etc.

Clean out my closets and purge
I did this in my main clothing closet; I need to continue with the hall and linen closets. Halfway there! 

Buy couch legs/fix couch
So I picked up my current couch curbside, and realized afterwards that it was missing legs. "No biggie, I'll just buy some at Home Depot and fix it myself," I thought. Wrong. I did buy legs, but the under-siding of the couch seems to be broken, as there was nothing for them to "grasp" on to, even when I tried matching them up to where the former legs were. I'm not sure I'm going to be able to complete this one. Any tips?? 

Update resume

Another work in progress. I've done several drafts and enlisted the help of some friends though, so hopefully this one will be completed soon! 

Have you ever completed or attempted a 101 in 1001 challenge? 

What are some things that might be on your list? 

Things I Learned on Vacation

Hey friends! I'm baaaaaaaack! As much as I missed this little space, it was a welcome break. I'm back with a fresh perspective and a full heart. I'm still catching up so bear with me as I muddle through, but I did want to share a few things I learned while I was away.

1. Leave yourself a little time before (and after) vacation to get re-adjusted. 
I had to burn some vacation days before I lost them come June 31st, and with work life being a bit finicky lately, I decided to add a day before and after my actual vacation to use them up without too much fuss. Mind you the 2 extra days were both Mondays, but usually I would work them just so I'd have more vacation days to use later. Like the majority of the 9-5, Mon-Fri working class, I hate Mondays. Being off allowed me to run extra errands beforehand and have an extra day to take care of getting groceries and an extra day to prepare to return to work afterwards. This was by far the best idea/thing I learned from this vacation.

2. Clean up before your leave.
Usually I just leave my apartment in packing disarray and "deal with it" when I return. I read this tip right before I left, so I decided to try it. I did laundry (including my bedding), tidied up everywhere, swept/mopped,cleaned out my fridge and took out trash. You guys, it made coming back so much more pleasant! I didn't worry about what I'd have to do when I got home because everything was done. Yeah, I'd have to unpack and do laundry, but everything else was clean/tidy. I cannot express how much of a relief this was! I'll definitely be doing this before every trip now- and sleeping in fresh sheets after a vacation just made sleeping in my own bed that much better! (I can't find the exact link, but this one offers some pre-vacation tips too!)

3. It's okay to take "me time" on vacation with others. 
I used to have a hard time with this. I just assumed that if you were on vacation with someone, or a group, you had to spend every waking minute with them. Newsflash: you don't. I think I first learned this tip on group trip to India a few years ago, but it was reinforced during this trip. Whether you're with one person or several, you're "allowed" to take a break from everyone and just be by yourself/do what you want. Even if it's a "romantic getaway," it's still your vacation, and you don't have to spend every waking minute with them. I loved spending time and making memories with Blue, but I also appreciated the solitude and space spent alone reading my book, staring at the ocean, and/or not talking. Being afforded that luxury while still being in a committed and loving relationship without worry is sometimes the best gift of all.

4. Manage your expectations. 
I sometimes have a hard time with this one, particularly if it's somewhere I've been before (like Puerto Rico) and/or have read a ton of reviews of somewhere/something (which I usually do...to excess). Honestly, I didn't have any expectations for this trip other than the Key West sunset cruise that I booked in advance, and spent ample time researching the best "bang for my buck" company to go with. (For the record, it did NOT disappoint. Definitely a highlight of the trip!) Not having many expectations for this trip made it that much more enjoyable when we stumbled upon ridiculously good food or an awesome place.

5. Leave room for spontaneity. 
I love to plan things, and vacations are my very favorite things to plan. I make detailed (read: down to the hour) itineraries and travel agendas, including driving directions, reservation numbers (when necessary), where to go in terms of importance/time order, etc. But for this trip, I had only planned the day trip to Key West (loosely, minus our sunset cruise reservation). Blue made it clear that she wanted to just chill- eat good food, have a few drinks, relax. So I found a few options for all of these things, but nothing was set in stone so we had the freedom to change it up if we wanted to, which we did. For instance in Miami I really wanted to see the Wynwood Walls but other than that I didn't care what we did. So we went there, but also spent ample time at the hotel pool and beirgarten, and the night eating Cuban food and taking in the people watching on Espanola Way. And it was fantastic.

6. Budget for extra expenses. 
Remember that post I wrote last week about how I don't like checking bags, so I try to keep packing to a minimum? Well, I still agree with that. However the bag I chose, though it did have extra space so I could squish it down, didn't exactly meet TSA guidelines for carry-on, so I had to check it for an extra $25 (each way)! And I didn't check beforehand, but the second hotel we stayed at in South Beach was valet parking only- and extra $40/day (luckily we only stayed there one night). And we were so excited when we arrived at our final destination that we went a little crazy at the tiki bar on the first night. Oops! My point is, always budget some wiggle room for hidden fees and extras!

7. Carry cash.
I included this one as one of my life lessons, but it's never been truer than on vacation. You don't know the lay of the land and you don't know when you're going to get to an ATM (let alone one that doesn't include extra fees), so carry cash. This is also important because in the service/hospitality business, it's always polite to tip those who are taking care of you. And they don't exactly take cards!

8. Be flexible. 
We rented a car and driving took up a lot of time. Like I said, I didn't really have a plan or itinerary for what we do do in Miami. We had a late flight on Saturday so we could spend more time in Miami, but we didn't know what we really wanted to do. I suggested going to Little Havana, the Cuban district of Miami. However this was another all-outdoor area, and after sweating our asses off at Wynwood Walls the day before, we both decided we didn't want a repeat, especially before getting on a flight- ew! So we headed to Coconut Grove, a shopping/entertainment area that one of Blue's coworkers mentioned, and it was the perfect place to grab a bite to eat and relax out of the heat for a little while before heading home.

9. Take care of nagging tasks before you depart. 
I had to run a bunch of errands before taking off, but I'm so happy I did, because I was able to truly relax while on vacation knowing that everything was taken care of. For instance, I have a bill due on the 15th and they don't have online/auto billing, so I made sure to mail it out before I left. My landlord updated the lease on my apt, so I made sure to send that out too. My phone storage was at capacity, so I needed to either update my plan or upload my photos to my computer (so I could take more on vacation!). It was such a great feeling to get those things out of the way so I could truly focus on enjoying my vacation.

10. LET GO!
I can honestly say that I looked at my email exactly once during vacation, and that was after I posted last week so I could answer a few of the comments I got. I didn't check work email once. And you know what? It was AWESOME. I strongly suggest that if you're prone to checking in to work while on vacation, you stop. You deserve a break. Take it!

What are some things you've learned lately? 

Top 10 Packing Tips

Right now, I'm on vacation in Key West, FL! While getting ready for the trip, I realized a bunch of things I do to make packing easier. So I wanted to share my top packing tips!

What's In The Bag (5 days):

5 Bottoms:

• 3 pairs of shorts
• 1 pair of jeans
• 1 dress

8 Tops:

• 5 t-shirts (one dressy)
• 2 long sleeve shirts
• 1 cardigan

3 Pairs of Shoes: 

• flip flops
• brown sandals
• strappy heels

Unmentionables:

• 7 pairs of underwear
• 4 bras

Personal Care:

• toiletry bag
• make-up bag
• glasses

Other:

• one nighty (sleepwear)
• one cami set (sleepwear)
• 2 bathing suit cover-ups
• 2 bathing suits
• cross-body bag
• wristlet

Wearing:

• Flats
• jeans
• t-shirt, and sweatshirt

Tips:

Know Before You Go: What do you plan to do on your trip? For this vacation, I plan to spend a day or two sightseeing, but mostly being a beach bum, so I know I won't be needing a lot of accessories or dressy clothes. Knowing what's on your itinerary can help you narrow down your options.

Pick A Color Palette: I like to stay with neutrals because I can easily mix and match everything easily, and rework different outfits. Sticking with clothes that are within a certain color wheel or picking a specific accent color or pattern can make choosing what to pack easier.

Wear The Bulky Stuff: I included what I'm wearing as a separate category because it's more clothes, just not taking up extra space in my suitcase. I always get cold on flights, so I'll be wearing a few layers (including a sweatshirt) and my sneakers.

Invest in empty travel size containers: It doesn't make any sense to be buying "travel size" toiletries at the store when you can get a whole set of empty containers at the Dollar Store and fill them with what you normally use. Yeah it may take an extra few minutes, but those travel-size toiletries add up!

Start a Border With Shoes!

Roll Your Clothes!: this is always my #1 tip. It seriously saves so much space, and leaves clothes less wrinkled upon arrival.

Don't leave empty spaces! Packing a wristlet? Why not fill it with your jewelry or other accessories? Closed toe shoes? Perfect for storing some of those unmentionables!

Not everything has to go in your Carry-on: You're allowed to bring in one carry-on (to place above in the storage space) and one "purse" that fits underneath your seat. I always leave extra room in this bag for anything that doesn't quite fit into the Carry-on. Extra shoes? Toss them in here! No room for the toiletry bag, or may need medicine while flying that you stored in there? Throw that in here for easier access! I always keep my electronics in here too, along with other necessities like my wallet and travel documentation. The best tip I've seen for getting the most out of your under-the-seat "purse" is to keep everything in pouches for easier retrieval, especially if you're in a rush. Also, keep what you need at the top, and the things that simply didn't fit at the bottom. 

Leave room for souvenirs!

What's the best tip you've learned or used? 

Friday Favorites

Have you ever noticed how the week before vacation always feels like the longest? No? Just me? Ok then. Anyway, I am so happy that it's Friday! I'm chopping off my hair this weekend and spending some time with Mom... I think. I'm not really sure, as she has lost her cell phone (again) and keeps calling me from different numbers at odd times during work, when I can't answer. Hopefully we'll figure it out before Sunday. What are your plans? Anyway, kicking it off with Amanda and some favorites from this week, including JT's new song!

Favorite Song: Justin Timberlake- Can't Stop the Feeling

Favorite Lust Item: How perfect is this tee? Get it here.

Favorite Quote:

Favorite Moment: I was kind of annoyed that a friend was throwing a Cinco de Mayo party on a school night, especially since she didn't have to go to work today, but it was a really fun time. I was in love with the taco/burrito bar, obvs. 

Favorite Purchase: The votes are in- the people want more Gilmore Girls loot! Lit Cube is offering up another limited box, and/or a monthly subscription. The first wave of submissions is almost at capacity already, so sign up soon if you want in! 

Favorite Reads: 

• Lessons in Persuasive Language from The Game of Thrones
• Singer-Songwriter Nelly Furtado stands up to Youtube underpaying and exploiting musicians and getting away with it
• Gloom and doom weather got you down? Try these 11 things to do when you don't feel like doing anything. 
• Tactics used by Google, Amazon and Apple to hire the best employees- be prepared! 

Favorite Funnies:

my favorite hand from game night last week

Mother's Day Display at Barnes & Noble

Stay dry this weekend friends!

I Got It From My Momma Pt. 2

A few months ago I shared some pearls of wisdom I learned from my mom. In honor of Mother's Day, I'm sharing a few more.

Shit happens. 
Put on your big-girl panties and deal with it.

Never turn your back on the ocean.

Don't blame other people for your mistakes. 
Own them. Learn from them. Try not to repeat them.

Print your pictures (so I can have some).
Ok so maybe this one was a little more self-serving, but a good reminder nonetheless.

Travel.
Learn about different cultures. Experience what the world has to offer.

Dress to impress.
Take your clothes to the cleaners. Put on some makeup. Look professional.

Have a firm handshake.
No one likes a weenie, limp handshake. Stand up tall, look people in the eye, and shake like you mean it.

Know sports.
Guys like sports. Coworkers like sports. It's something to talk about when you're stuck in the elevator.

Also this:

And this:

What are some things you've learned from some special women in your life? 

Wishing a Happy (early) Mother's Day to all the mommas out there!

Currently: May

Reading: Still...

Listening To: my spring playlist on Spotify

Watching: Game of Thrones, Grey's Anatomy (current and Season 6), Nashville, Blindspot

Making: Cheesy breadsticks! 

Organizing: My bathroom stuffs with this awesome organizer from Home Goods. 

Smelling: this yummy face mask from Lush! 

Pondering: What I can do to make myself more valuable for a possible work opportunity.

Celebrating: Nothing right now, though Blue's niece is graduating from college later this month! 

Bookmarking: Things to do in Key West, specifically on Trip Advisor. Got any tips or must-sees?

Sipping: craft brews. 

Going: to see Cirque du Soleil's Paramour on Broadway tonight! And also vacation to Florida, in precisely 7 days. Unfortunately, my brain is already there. 

What's up with you currently? 
Linking up with Anne, Jenna, Kristen and Gretchen!